Deciding to Stay At Home

I got quite a few comments and emails galore after posting about my decision to be a stay at home mom.  I knew that it's a decision that tons of women struggle with, and I'm so incredibly glad I posted.  Now I feel much more normal knowing that so many women feel just like I did - and that pursuing a career while raising a family definitely isn't for everyone.

I'm even more thankful that so many working mothers emailed (or in the case of my real life friends, wanted to sit down for a chat over wine or Starbucks!) to let me know that they still respect me.  That's the one and only thing I was afraid of...that working women would view me as giving up something(s) that I'd worked very hard for and that they'd respect me less.  So really, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. Thank you all - moms and not-yet-moms, and a few dads!

Right after posting, my neighbor and good friend gave me a book.  It's called In Praise of Stay At Home Moms.  It's a light, easy read and I can't recommend it enough if you are seriously struggling with your decision to stay at home or if you are just needing some encouragement.  Trust me, as thankful as I am to be staying at home and as much as I love it, sometimes the days are so long and I wonder if anything I'm doing is "right"...this book just reaffirmed me and boosted my confidence that things are gonna be ok!

I really can't recommend this book to my working mom friends.  It's by Dr. Laura and she can be a bit abrasive, condescending and judgmental.  I don't agree with everything she says and if I were a working mom, I'd be seriously offended by this book.  If I were working out of necessity rather than desire, I think the book would really depress me.

As someone who never saw myself as a mother until not long before getting pregnant, and definitely didn't know if I could even do this stay at home gig, lots of things have been eye-opening to say the least!  If you just need an ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on, please email me!  I know what it's like to be unsure of my decision and not want to burden any of my friends with my neurotic back-and-forth wavering!

Oh!  And on a more exciting note - we're planning a vacation for this summer.  Drumroll please....it's going to be away from Georgia!  We're looking at going to Jamaica and staying at a child free resort (but not Hedonism or anything like that!).  Have you visited Montego Bay or Ochos Rios?  I'd love to hear about it!

Some More Fun Fashion

My friend Tabitha used to own a baby clothing store. Now that her tots are turning into kiddos, she has switched to selling adorable grown-up clothes. She currently sells from her Facebook page, and a website is in the works. A contest is going on, and lots of prizes are up for grabs! Check out the Duck Duck Goose Facebook page - if you decide to give her a thumbs up (aka "Like") tell her that Haute Mommy Blog sent ya!

Not sure if you've noticed, but Stella & Dot is now a sponsor of Haute Mommy blog! Check out my favorites - the Serenity and Capri earrings and the Rhea bangle bracelets. If you'd like to have a blog party to get a Stella & Dot giftcard, please email.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Sweet Georgia wants to wish everyone lots of hugs and kisses today!

And Mommy sends here sincerest apologies that Georgia's first Valentine's Day cards may not make it to her friends in time.  I totally miscalculated the shipping time on my order - next time I'll spring for overnight shipping, oops!

Haute Mommy Monday: Beauty Products I'm Loving Now!

I've had this post in my head for a couple of months, and every time I reach for one of these products I remember that I've been meaning to tell y'all about them!  Right now I love anything that makes my life easier.  I no longer have time for long bubble bath soaks or going to get facials.  Little five minute luxuries help me keep my sanity and feel as if I'm still pampering myself.

I first got a sample of REN Glycolactic Mask in a Sephora order and oh my gosh, it was love at first use!  It's a really thin mask that you put on after washing your face.  Leave it on for five minutes or so then rinse off.  No peeling, scrubbing or anything like that.  My skin immediately just looks fresher - there's really no other word for it.  Just a bit more glowy than usual, and I love it!  I should probably use this more, but I only do it about once a week.  I haven't had any peeling, dry skin, or other undesirable side effects, just fantasic skin...and it only takes a couple of minutes!  I usually only remember to do stuff like this at bedtime, but I have also just quickly put it on while brushing my teeth and getting ready to go out to dinner.

I know Clarisonics are old news, I've been addicted to mine for a few years.  Now that I can't remember the last time I went to get a facial (oh wait, yeah I can...it was over a year ago!!), I definitely use my Clarisonic at least every other day.  I just keep it in the shower and use it in there with my usual face wash (I rotate between Clean & Clear and St. Ives, depending on how my face feels that day - the beauty of Clarisonic is that any old cheap stuff will do!).  I'm usually not able to put on face treatment (I love Ole Henri) right after showering, so I'm not sure I'm reaping the full benefits, but the Clarisonic + a weekly Ren mask seem to be doing the trick and keeping my skin looking good.

When I first bought my Clarisonic, I was a tad nervous about the price, but it turns out to be one of the most cost effective things I've ever bought.  It has been totally worth the price, I would buy it again in a heartbeat.  I found a pretty good deal on mine on QVC.com.  Go through ebates to purchase and make the price a little easier to swallow.

Right when Georgia turned four months old, that luxurious "pregnancy hair" started falling out by the handful.  Every time I washed my hair, the tub was FULL of it, and I would find clumps of my hair all over the house. I  thought something was medically wrong, so I did a little research and found that pregnancy and very-post-birth hormones keep that thick glossy hair around.  I did some whining to my mom about it, and soon found a box of Wen Cleansing Conditioner delivered to me.  I have to say that I'm not one to experiment with my hair, but I was desperate!  I found a few YouTube videos about how it works and gave it a try.  It took a couple of weeks, but now my hair is better than ever!  I use the Pomegranate scent.  The whole idea was a little much for me to believe at first, but I can honestly say that I've left my Bumble & Bumble products on the shower shelf for months now.

Speaking of only washing my hair twice a week...on the third day, I really need something to give it a little pick me up.  Unless I just throw it into a ponytail, which happens much more often than I'd like to admit!  Someone brought some Suave Dry Shampoo to our favorite things party.  Although I didn't end up with it as one of my prizes, I picked some up at CVS.  Best $5 I've ever spent!  Not too much more to say about it, except what do you have to lose?  It's just five bucks - definitely worth a try!

Aquafresh Extreme Clean toothpaste - another $5 win.  I haven't bleached my teeth in almost two years (since before I got pregnant), yet every time I go to the dentist she insists on asking me if I'm cheating on her, although she knows the answer will be an emphatic no.  The only conclusion we can come to is that I've been a faithful user of Aquafresh Extreme Clean in the orange box for years now.  I first started using it when it was free with ECB at CVS and I've been hooked ever since.  Even with the amount of Coke, Starbucks and sweets I consume, my teeth strangely seem to get whiter!

Speaking of cheap buys I refuse to live without...I've been sporting Forever 21 skinny jeans for awhile, and they hands-down beat the couple of $180+ pairs I've purchased and never wear.  For ten dollars!!  Sometimes they even go on sale for $5!  I wore them until I was at least six months pregnant.  And the good thing about inexpensive denim is that you can throw it in the dryer and it shrinks right back up.  Actually, sometimes that isn't such a good thing...you know what I mean!  Anyway, I still wear the pair I had when pregnant, in addition to a few more.  Love 'em.

What about you, do you have any haute, cheap, can't live without items I should try?

Do You Believe In Fortune Cookies?

I do.

The above fortune is taped to our fridge.

The evening of my first baby shower in Houston, we ordered Pei Wei for dinner.  David's parents and my mom sat with us around the dining table and we all opened our fortunes and had a laugh at them.  I knew right then that Baby Girl wouldn't come on her due date.

The first two lucky numbers are 5 and 19, so I knew her birthday would be May 19.  She was born on May 20; she would have been born on the19th had I not asked my doctor to do what he could to "delay" my labor so that my mom could be here for her birth.  I went into labor May 18 and into the hospital May 19.

Two other memorable fortunes I've gotten include "You can talk your way out of almost anything" and "You are often the life of the party".  I saved both of those, too.

Do you have any weird fortune cookie stories?

Aunt Annie's Visit

David's sister Ann came to meet Georgia last weekend and we all had a great time.  When Ann left Minneapolis, the temperature was negative four degrees.  When she arrived here it was seventy-something, so she felt like she was on a tropical vacation.  Seriously, negative four!  I don't see how they stand it!

Sunday afternoon we went to downtown Houston's Discovery Green and snapped a few pictures.

I was really happy for Ann's visit because we went for a run together.  The last time I ran was April 2010 (after my last half marathon), so almost two years ago!  I wasn't sure if I'd be able to make it three miles, but I did.  I took Georgia out for her first jog this Monday.  I had a 2.5 mile route mapped out for us, but we only made it through about 1.5-2 miles. I haven't bought a jogging stroller yet, so Georgia kept getting bounced around and looking at me like I was crazy.  Of course it rained off and on all day Tuesday, but hopefully we will make it out again today.

Last week Georgia got teeth #4 and #5.  At lunch with Ann, I gave Georgia a Num-Num cracker and she got the saddest little face when she bit into it.  She tried again and started crying.  I opened her mouth to see four more teeth trying to make their way through!  They seem to be coming and going, and aren't causing too many problems.  At this rate, she will be eating steak at her first birthday party.

Teething hasn't been a problem for us.  No fussing and not too much chewing.  I wouldn't have known that three top teeth popped through if I hadn't been practically holding her upside down playing with her.  She has two bottom teeth and three on top (two front and one left).  They're hard to photograph, but the two bottom teeth make for the cutest smile!

Books in 2012

I'm so awful at keeping up with Good Reads, I marked too many as "To Read" and now I can't keep it organized.  I'm compiling a list here that I hope to keep up with.  I hope to read 40 books in 2012.

Books Read in 2012

1. Catching Fire (January)
2. Bel Canto (January)
3. Mockingjay (February)

Currently Reading

In Praise of Stay At Home Moms
Lost Memory of Skin
Slow & Steady
Rebel T3 Digital Field Guide
Sink Reflections

Our First Ride

I've prided our family on making it through eight months without resorting to driving around in the car to get her to sleep.  We ended our eight month streak last weekend in a hilarious story that David and I will never forget!

Our friends Gentrie and James were staying with us and getting up at five so that James could run the Houston Marathon.  Georgia had a bit of fun with our guests before her bath, and she went to bed with no protests at her usual time, 8 p.m.  We were all pretty tired, so David and I were in bed pretty early, too.

At 11 p.m. Georgia woke up and started making noises.  She hasn't woken up for more than a second or two in months.  We thought she was just rolling over and getting comfortable.  But the noises kept getting louder and more persistent.  If it had been just the three of us, I would have just let her play in our bed.  But our house is old and small, which means that you can hear every noise all over the house.  I told David to go in and try to quiet her down and I rolled over and went back to sleep.

At 1 a.m. David came rushing into our room carrying Georgia and said, "We need some help!" in a fairly frantic voice.  Of course I expected the worst - did she swallow something small?  Chew through an electric cord?  Poop on the floor?  Wait - this is our baby, not our dog!  But still - did she swallow something small or chew through a cord?  This had better not be about a diaper...

Somewhat annoyed, but alarmed, I jumped out of bed and asked what happened.  He replied with, "We need help getting her to sleep!"  Georgia was cooing and babbling extremely loudly, so I said the first thing I could think of to get her out of the house and away from James: "Let's go to the car!"

It was one of the coldest nights this winter, so we strapped her in the carseat, tucked blankets in around her and sneaked quickly (but quietly!) out the back door.  We started driving around Loop 610, with Georgia chatting away to herself in the backseat.

We pondered what we should do; we've never been out and about with a baby in the middle of the night.  Bars were out of the question and neither of us was hungry enough for IHOP.  Since we were wearing pajamas and slippers, we quickly considered Wal-Mart, but decided instead to keep driving.

At about 1:45 I noticed Georgia had finally quieted down, so we headed for home.  I checked to make sure she was sleeping and she was.  Her little mouth was hanging open and she was breathing evenly.  We slowly got her seat out of the car and planned to just put it on our bed.  As I was opening the door to the house, her eyes popped open and she got a huge smile on her little face.  "Weeeeee!"  David took her out of her seat and tried to quiet her down in her room, but I could hear her talking and playing, even with earplugs.  He came in and told me he was just going to go drive around some more.

At 5, I heard Gentrie and James leaving, but David wasn't in bed with me.  I just assumed he had slept on the floor in Georgia's room.  Nope!  They both came waltzing in a few minutes later.  David slept in the car with her!  Apparently she was working on trying to crawl and wouldn't stay content in her bed.  And when he put her on the floor with him, she just wanted to be noisy and for him to play with her.

We laughed about it all week...especially the text Gentrie sent to David at 5, letting him know his car lights were on.  As for David, it's really the first time he's been up all night with a baby and he swears its one of his best memories yet.

I Don't Want It All

It's with lots of hesitation that I write this post.  I don't want to be judged or thought to be taking a step back for womankind just because I, one person, feel this way.  Maybe it's due to our mothers' generation, but little girls are raised to want it all and to be able to achieve everything they want.  I definitely was told from a young age that I could be and do anything and everything I wanted (and we will impress this upon Georgia as well).  I knew that it would be possible to have a career, even a demanding one if I chose so, while nurturing my marriage and raising a houseful of children, if that's the path I wanted to take.

Somewhere between getting my degree, climbing the corporate ladder and growing a baby inside my belly, I realized that having it all was possible.  But I also realized that was definitely not the path I wanted to take.  It's a very personal choice, and I don't think one choice is necessarily better than the other.  But I know which choice is right for me.

Lately I've been asked more times than I care to count the expected question: "Are you bored/unfulfilled/unstimulated/not using your full potential/needing adult conversation/guilty for not contributing financially/etc etc etc?"  Some people I know are genuinely curious and struggling to make the same decision for their own life.  But other times, even from friends, the question comes across as very judgmental.  When that happens, I often feel flustered before I answer and I hope that doesn't make them think they are right.

But the truth is, no - I don't feel any of those things.  I've developed a couple of hobbies (happily, they don't involve the computer or internet) to keep me stimulated and keep my brain squeaking.  If I'm ever bored, it's my own fault for allowing myself to feel that way since there are always plenty of things for me to do.  Same with adult conversation.  I get more of that now than I did as a career girl, and now it's on subjects I actually want to talk about!  I've developed new friendships with other mothers I see daily at the park, and strengthened friendships I already had.

Don't get me wrong; it's not all fun and games all day long.  There are plenty of days when, at six o'clock, I know without a doubt that being in an office all day would have been the easier job.  And in the beginning I did worry that "just being a mom" would leave me wanting for more at the end of the day.  But watching Georgia catch on to something new I've taught her or discover something altogether on her own is more than enough to make my heart and brain swell with pride.  More so than anything ever has.

I also don't mind being a homemaker.  Now that I'm here and not focusing on my career, charity board obligations, and keeping tons of other people happy, our house feels so much more like a home.  Rather than a stack of invitations to be mailed and fundraiser decorations to be assembled, I'm surrounded by colorful wooden blocks and little stuffed animals.  Even with a pile of laundry beside me on the couch and a kitchen floor in desperate need of mopping, I am happier than ever.  These piles of laundry and the sounds, sights and smells of our house are what make it a home.  Now I really take pride in having a nutritious (or not so healthy, but amazingly fun) meal on the table for David.  As 1950's as it is, I don't mind doing his laundry or ironing his shirts - because he's out working so that I am able to stay home.

As much as I like a challenge,  I have absolutely no desire to juggle a family, career and marriage. If that makes me seem less of a go-getter and diminishes me in the eyes of others'...well, I'll just have to stay a lesser person to them.  I know in my heart and in my mind that I "just being a mom" fulfills and challenges me in ways that working outside the home never did.

More Signs...

More signs I need to get things under control in a really bad way:

• I just found a brand spankin' new pair of AG jeans in my closet. $185 and I forgot that I ever bought them.  I was just complaining last night that I only have one pair of nice jeans that fit well.  These need to get altered, glad I am just going to spend $25 rather than buy a whole new pair of jeans.
• I knew I had a black turtleneck sweater somewhere.  Or maybe not.  But I have photographs of me wearing one three years ago on our ski trip.  Yep, just found it on a shelf in my closet.  Right under the jeans.  Cashmere.  I wasted half the winter not wearing it, and it used to be my most favorite sweater!

I'm mad at myself right now!